Your menopause tracker. For your phone.
You’re not
imagining it.
You’re just trying to make sense of it.
Hot Mess is a menopause tracker that helps you log your symptoms, spot your personal patterns and understand what’s happening to your body.
Now on Google Play. Free for 14 days, then from £4.58 a month. Cancel any time.
Track the heat. Tame the mess.
Your data. Your phone. Your privacy. No account. No ads. No selling your personal data.
What happened to me?
Two minutes. Sound on.
Does any of this sound familiar?
You're wide awake at three in the morning, again. You lose a word halfway through a sentence, in front of people. Your jumper comes off, goes back on, comes off. You snap at someone you love, then beat yourself up for hours, guilty, fighting a battle with yourself that nobody else can see. Then you finally get to the doctor and can't remember half of what you wanted to say.
Walk in with the facts
One tap turns your last 30 or 90 days into a one-page summary for your doctor: symptoms, sleep, triggers, the lot.
No more "I'm just tired". Hand over the page and start talking. It stays on your phone until you choose to print it or send it.
Four taps a day
Hot flushes, sleep, mood and clarity, on one Home screen with your week, your patterns and a box you can type anything into. Log how today feels in seconds and watch your day fill in.
Easy to use, because who wants the messing about when you're already a flibbertigibbet? Add hours slept, water, weight and your cycle if you like, and a note when you need one. Under a minute a day.
See your patterns
Seven, thirty or ninety days at a glance. Which foods come before the bad days. Whether sleep, water or movement seem to help.
The app spots the links for you and says them plainly, like "alcohol tends to come before your worst flushes".
Food without the faff
Search a built-in list or a database of millions of products, tap a common drink, tick a trigger. Your triggers, your list.
Calories, protein, calcium and magnesium are counted for you, with a gentle note when a day's running low.
Calm on tap
Guided sessions for a flush, a 3am wake-up or a foggy morning, with the words on screen as the minutes pass.
Twelve sessions, two to ten minutes each, sorted by what you're dealing with right now, with ten longer ones in Hot Mess Plus. Included, no headphones needed.
Ask Emma
Type a question into the box at the top of Home, like "why am I awake at 3am?", and get an answer in Emma's voice that knows your last 30 days.
A free bonus with the app. Off until you switch it on; when it's on, only your question and a short summary of your numbers go to our server, never your name or your notes. Plain words and general information, not medical advice.
Your watch, if you have one
Steps, sleep, heart rate and, on watches that measure it, your overnight skin temperature, read from Health Connect with your permission and kept on your phone like everything else. Hot Mess can spot a hot flush you slept through and ask you in the morning whether it was one.
Optional. Hot Mess on its own needs no watch, no wearable and no account.
About the founder
Emma 
Jekyll and Hide. I'm the calm one. Mostly.
Hi, I'm Emma. I built Hot Mess because I needed it, and if you've read this far, I've a feeling you might too.
That list at the top of the page was me. Tired eyes, weight from nowhere, a fuse the length of a matchstick. My family called it Jekyll and Hide, mostly because they were the ones hiding. On the nights I couldn't sleep I'd end up on the sofa with the Golden Girls, watching Blanche insist she was far too young for "the change", and thinking, love, same.
Then one of those nights it landed. I wasn't a mess. I was a hot mess. That's where the name came from, and the idea too. Nobody had warned me. Did anyone warn you?
Here's what helped. I started writing my days down. Four taps, that's all. Within a couple of weeks I could see it: the late coffee and the sweet treat were behind the 3am wake-ups, and the bread I was leaning on was behind the bloating. I swapped them, and I slept. Small things, but they gave me a bit of control back, and a page of facts to hand my doctor instead of a shrug.
So that's what Hot Mess is. Your days, your patterns, on your phone, with no account, no ads and no lecture. The blog is up and the members' community is open. I hope you'll join me.
One last thing, because it matters. I'm not a doctor and I'm not selling a cure. I'm a woman going through it, with a good app and a lot of notes. If anything here makes you think "oh, it's not just me", we're already getting somewhere.
The Hot Mess community
A private members' space for women going through the same thing, away from the big social networks. Say what you actually feel, ask the questions you would not ask at work, and hear from women who get it. Emma is in there most days.
Separate from the app, from £5.49 a month, cancel any time. See the community.
Free bonuses with the app
All of this comes with the app at no extra cost.
- Ask Emma. A question box on Home that answers in Emma's voice, using your own last 30 days. Switch it on when you want it.
- Your watch. Steps, sleep, heart rate and night flushes from Health Connect, if you have a watch. Optional.
- Private by design. No account, no ads, nothing leaves your phone unless you send it.
- Track your nutrients. Calories, protein, calcium and magnesium counted for you.
- Fasting tracker. Set your eating window and see how you kept to it.
- Cycle and symptoms. Periods, spotting and where you are in the change.
- Movement. Log walks, strength, stretches and more, with step-by-step routines.
The blog is live. New here? Start with Welcome to the 3am club. The members' community is open: join here.
Got a question? Whether it's iPhone, cancelling or your data, the answers are here.
What it costs
Free for 14 days, then from £4.58 a month. Pick a plan inside the app, and Google Play only charges you when the trial ends. Cancel before that and you pay nothing.
Founding member price. Join at launch and your price is locked in for as long as you stay, whatever it costs later.
Founding members keep their launch price for as long as they stay.
Ready when you are. Hot Mess is on Google Play now.
Hot Mess is a tracking aid, not a medical device, and does not give medical advice. Contact: hello@thehotmessapp.com